8:14
Hahaha the title on the screen says "Story of Ricky (aka Ricky-Oh)". There is no way this can be a bad movie.
8:16
Is it racist that I'm trying to figure out if this is Chinese or Japanese? If not then my bet is on Chinese.
8:17
Oh man! A movie set in the future that takes place in the past! YEAH! I'm excited.
8:18
The audience is being introduced to a group of prisoners. Ricky Ho has the worst offense so far with manslaughter. He also hasn't said a word but felt the need to flash his six pack abs.
8:19
He claims the 5 bullets in his chest are souvenirs and cannot be removed.
8:20
The adr and Foley work on this film are just amazing. It sounds so real. Right up their with 90's Bollywood. Aside from the sound you meet the gang of 4, a group of prisoners that patrol one of the prison cells. They seem pretty badass because they just skinned some guys face. Did not see that coming.
8:22
Gahhh! The big brother of the gang just "fell" (and by fell I mean was tripped by Riki-Oh) onto falling on a random board with nails sitting upright. Why was this there? No one seems to question it so I guess I won't either. But it's okay, because he is still alive.
8:23
Teh-he there is a character named Silly Lung
8:26
Ma (maybe the guy that got skinned) killed himself because they didn't give him probation and while they are taking out his dead body (in the middle of the night) Riki somehow got out of his cell and is in the courtyard. Why don't the guards question this? I guess there are no questions in kung fu movies. Only screaming at the sky while you practice your sweet moves.
8:28
Jeez there are a lot of scenes in the bathroom. Hahahaha this character's intro was just him walking and earthquakes happening. How does Riki respond? He punches his intestines out. Follow it with a long agonizing death scene.
8:29
The guy who fell on nails earlier tries to attack him and he punches right through his body. This is after the guy tried to stab him with a nail. It only went through Riki's hand (tis a flesh wound) while Riki went on to break the other guy's entire hand.
8:31
Ughhh??? Is Riki having a heart attack? Or is he willing himself to heal extremely fast? What just happened? Transition to flashback? Memories are painful?
8:32
Man, kung fu looks pretty silly when you have no one to fight.
8:34
This boy is on FIIIRRREEE!! (watch to find out) Learning kung fu in a graveyard seems disrespectful. I realize the headstones aren't marked but should you really be smashing them?
8:36
Gross. Is the warden a vampire? Can someone please cook that steak it looks disgusting!! Anyways, Riki is now meeting with the Warden after killing the inmates. Poor kid, he just wanted to learn to play the flute (that is what he went to college for).
8:38
Jeez. Riki just keeps getting stabbed in the hand. This time by the warden. I guess he is pretty made he killed those inmates. They were his friends. Riki spits blood on his face and it matches his fake wooden, red of all colors, eye.
8:40
Riki found out his girlfriend died and has gone "crazy eyed". Get ready for some slow motion, jerky fight scenes.
8:41
I just realized that behind the warden is just a wall full of pornos. Classy guy that warden is. Unfortunately no blood was spilt in that that office... yet
8:44
How do these prisoners keep getting weapons? A bunch of prisoners cornered another prisoner, I think he is part of the gang. They are blaming him for the death of Ma and want to kill him. But the prisoner with roses tattooed tells them to stop. This guy also expressed interest in recruiting Riki for his gang. Roses then went on to cut half way through some one's face. The warden applauded and then dragged off the wounded with his hook hand. what am I watching and does it have a plot?
8:48
Is roses part of the gang of 4? He just challenged Riki to a fight. He blinds Riki with shards of glass. But Riki isn't going to give up that easily. He found some sort of hose and cleaned his eyes out. I think he just gave himself stitches... with his own tendon.
8:51
WTF? The guy just cut himself open, pulled out his intestines, and then tried to strangle Riki with it. Didn't take much for Riki to beat him after that. The other prisoners are overjoyed with their meager fist pumps and quiet cheers.
8:52
The prisoners start to turn on the warden now that the gang of 4 isn't in control. But when they try to attack a group of ninjas (or what I'm calling ninjas) appeared out of nowhere to protect him.
8:54
Did you go to school to play the flute, random godson? No! Then stop trying to blow on that leaf. It's not going to make noise!!
8:59
The ninja assassins from earlier got made that the godson person told Riki about Poppy leaves (heaven forbid!) so they killed him by slicing the skin off his face.
9:01
Riki gets back by burning down their greenhouse and is going to challenge the man/woman ninja to a fight. He/she seems like more of a match than the others he has fought so far.
9:10
Badass pimp is arriving at the prison. Everyone is afraid of him. This is the head warden. The other one was just the assistant. This pimp warden just stabbed some one's eye out with his pimp cane.
9:12
It seems as if the pimp warden also suffers from random heart attacks just like Riki does.
9:15
I'm not sure what the plot is to this film but Riki just punched some one's face apart. To be fair this man was one of the ninja assassins and he was beating up on Riki, probably was about to kill him. The put Riki in a room with a metal ceiling that is slowly lowering, meant to crush Riki. But his strength is stopping it. So they shock the metal with a tazer.
9:17
The ninja assassin you thought was dead is still alive and holding the ceiling up long enough for Riki to make his escape. Why doesn't Riki just kill the wardens and be done with it. It's not doing anyone any good to keep them alive. They just keep killing everyone anyways.
9:20
In another attempt to kill Riki, they are ordering all the prisoners to bury him alive. If they refuse then they have guards standing by with guns reading to shoot. They put a bamboo shoot by him and say that if he lasts 7 days underground then they will set him free.
9:26
Is this the exciting conclusion? After seven days, they are digging him out. It doesn't look good for Riki who is barely conscious.
9:29
Jesus this movie is bloody. He/she assassin just put a handful of razors in Riki's mouth and then proceeded to hit him in the face with a wrench (numerous times).
9:32
Do they lock these cell doors? I'm pretty sure the prisoners just opened them from inside their cell. And only to peek out and see what the assistant warden was up to.
9:33
Riki is like the Asian Popeye. Just give him some rice and he is ready to kick ass.
9:41
I close my eyes for one second and we are definitely in the final battle scenes now. The pimp warden somehow turned into the hulk warden and it's up to Riki to STOP THE MADNESS.
9:44
And we come to the end of the film, which makes me wonder... Why didn't Riki just kill the bad guys right away and then save us an hour of our lives and gallons of fake blood? O well. Also it's really hard to live blog when you are trying to read dialogue. Sorry that I did a terrible jobs with names and plot.
This film is super duper gory. But don't worry nothing looks realistic. That's probably the only reason to watch is just for that. They don't have cool fight scenes with lots of skill. Just punching through things mainly. The acting isn't too impressive. Very over the top and offensive when it comes to the pimp warden's son (who I didn't even mention). Sound effects were of a typical old fashion kung fu movie. And the plot. Very very minimal. But it was funny to watch the death scenes I guess.
Rating: *
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